As moms, we have a lot that depends on us and that on any normal day can be stressful as it is. But now that many of us are stuck at home due to the stay-at-home order it can be much more stressful. Knowing how to be a calm mom during these stressful times will make a huge difference in your own sanity.
There are many different struggles moms face while at home and during this pandemic it is something else. Something we didn’t expect and something we weren’t prepared for. Some of us moms don’t have too much of a change if we were already stay-at-home moms, but those who are now working from home or laid off, it will be a huge adjustment into the new norm.
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The Struggles We Have Being A Mom Lately
While normal life as a mom is hectic this change has all of us on edge. We have so many new things to handle and all at once. As a country, if you weren’t considered an essential employee you needed to stay home.
This means you may have been a stay-at-home mom already, but now you have the whole family at home. Now stuck in a house, no school for the kids, your husband is home, and everyone is getting cabin fever.
There is only so much a person can take. Thankfully though we live in a time where we can call each other, facetime, be on social media, and even learn online. But that doesn’t mean everything will be easy peasy.
For the most part, you will now be confined to your house. Getting stir crazy from being cooped up and even worse with the whole family inside.
It is funny that to a good amount of people this is their normal lifestyle, but now that we are all being told to stay home everyone wants to be outside. Including the people who like to be home a lot.
But being stuck inside is a very annoying thing because you can get bored of it quickly. And it can cause tensions to rise since there is nowhere to go to cool off.
Everything is basically new to us. In America, this doesn’t happen. We aren’t used to being home all day or being home with everyone in our family at the same time all day every day.
We can get through this though.
If you have newborns then being home with them for the first few months is normal. Not going out much when you first have a kid is pretty easy, but when you have toddlers and up it isn’t easy.
Having rambunctious toddlers is a normal thing and taking them to the park or playground to tire them out is the best thing for moms. The only problem is that playgrounds are roped off, closed, and parks are pretty nerve-wracking to go to at this time.
Now you have to entertain them at home. And most likely cooped up in the house because not everyone has a backyard to play in.
There is only so much you can do to entertain them without getting too repetitive. Once they get bored you have a cranky, annoyed child who won’t listen, might throw a temper tantrum, or starts becoming naughty and wrecking things.
Which of course starts stressing moms out and then trying to be a calm mom might be out the window. The sad part is that most stress probably won’t come from your kids, but actually from having your husband home.
Husbands Being Home
After all of these years, I have finally learned why most wives send their husbands out to have a hobby. Whether that be fishing, working on cars, working out, etc..
For the longest time, many of us wanted our husbands to be home more to spend more time with us and work less. Now that many men are home 24/7 with us we realize why we need so much time apart.
Men being home causes many troubles and a lot of stress as well. Especially for us moms.
Because they either…
Leave large messes everywhere,
Mess with our routines,
Make it harder by giving into the temper tantrums our kids have,
Ask a ton of questions expecting us to know the answer,
Or continue to distract us while we are trying to get everything done.
That right there is a lot of stress to put on a mom who is already trying to cope with the changes going on.
And the sad part is I could keep going with that list because for some odd reason when a woman marries a man or even dates them for a long time she has already become a mom. Once she has a kid then she had two kids to take care of, her man and her baby. But I digress.
If you have the opportunity to send your husband outside of the house for something like fishing or going for a run then do it.
This will really get you because of this stay-at-home order many people are out of jobs. And that means unemployment is sky-high.
The government is paying people a lot for unemployment right now, but the system has been crashing due to the high numbers. Which is pretty scary if you don’t have anyone working and don’t have any income coming in right now.
I know that finances have been a big stressor for basically everyone on a normal basis, but now more than ever. This change makes it even tougher to stay calm and keep your sanity as a mom. Which is why I want to help you through it.
How To Be A Calm Mom During These Stressful Times
I know these days drag on and it seems like you lose track of how long we have been in this situation, but we will make it out. One day all of this will be over and we can go back to our regular norms. But for now, we need to focus on a few things first to keep our sanity. And to be a calm mom during this time instead of being the hot messes we might become.
We need to be calm because moms set the tone in the family. Moms usually are the ones balancing everyone’s lives and making sure things get done at the same time. Which means we need to find the balance for the time being and come out of this pandemic better than when we started. So we need to take a deep breath.
Take A Deep Breath
Before we do anything we need to breathe. We can’t go into any of this all frantic and not thinking straight. Take some time to calm down and get into the right mentality to do something about the situation instead of just reacting to it.
I know for some of us it might be harder to do because we all are at different points of our lives which means our situations are all different. But that doesn’t mean we can jump into anything without thinking through.
There needs to be a sense of clarity to actually get something done about your situation instead of just reading it through and acting rashly. So I suggest to take a couple of deep breaths and then get ready to make some changes for the better. In a calm manner of course.
Plan A Budget
When it comes down to it one of the best things to do is to start budget planning. Many of us are now on a stricter budget than we might have had before because of the layoffs and jobs that are considered non-essential.
Now that may seem intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be. It really is just about finding out how much you have to spend in certain areas of your life. How much you have that can be spent and how much is already going to bills.
It doesn’t have to be something extremely detailed and down to the price per cup of coffee you make at home. That really would be extreme. Just something that is basic. One that can tell you how much you have leftover to spend on the little luxuries, what goes into bills, and what you can save.
Find Your Routine
Having everyone home creates another issue, the change of routine. Start by figuring out what your family needs throughout the day.
Have your breakfast, lunch, and dinner routines where you eat together as a family at the table. This way you have parts of your day without having the TV on if you usually eat your meals around the TV.
You will probably see the TV enough during this time at home anyway. There are only so many times you can binge-watch shows.
Add-in some of your favorite activities to do as a family. From a time to read or do arts and crafts to board games or watching the overall family favorite movies or shows.
Then don’t forget to have bedtime routines as well. Especially if you have young ones. Always remember that children need structure and that is hard on them when there isn’t structure. So create those bedtime, naptime, bathtime, etc routines.
Routines will also keep you from losing your sanity by trying to figure out something new to do every time at the last minute. And you can get the chores done throughout the day when you have routines set up to work with what needs to be done.
Reconnect As A Family
Don’t forget that this time can actually be a privilege because now you can reconnect as a family. Spend more quality time together and get to learn each other once again.
Being home with everyone means you have the time to do things you usually wouldn’t be able to. Things like cooking as a family more often or playing board games.
You can even learn new things together. Like learning a new language which would be great for the whole family. If you start learning a language during the stay-at-home order then you can come out of this will a better chance to be paid more at your job or even at a new job.
Bi-lingual people do make more money than someone who only speaks English. And young kids pick up on foreign languages much faster than when they get older. So you would be setting your kids up for a better future.
More things you can learn as a family during this time are things like cooking, painting, gardening, and yoga. Just something to do and learn together as a family is better for bonding than just sitting in the same room all on different devices.
Have An Outlet/ You Time
No matter what you need to find time for yourself during all of this. As good as it is to reconnect with everyone and get set into your routine you need to have something for yourself.
Something that lets you relax or think by yourself without any interruption. It can be anything and even having an outlet works as well as your time.
Whatever it is that lets you reduce the stressors of the day or just be able to feel at peace you need to make time for it. I find the best times for time alone as a mom is either before everyone wakes up if you are a morning person or after your kids go to sleep.
Many times after kids go to sleep it is considered mommy and daddy time. But sometimes it is better for just mom to have her time and dad to do his own thing as well. This way both mom and dad can have some much needed alone time.
Being around each other 24/7 isn’t an easy thing to deal with. So just have time to yourself can actually better your relationship than spending all 24 hours of the day together every single day until this ends.
Another option is having that outlet I was talking about. It can be something like yoga or maybe working out at home time since we can’t go to the gym anymore. Maybe even do crafty DIYs if you love to get creative.
Try A Work From Home Job
If you are worried about the finances during this time then you might as well look into working from home jobs if you aren’t already. This could start out a bit slower with some of the jobs you can do from home, but there are some really good long term options when it comes to making money from home.
You could become a Virtual Assistant and help people and companies from home year-round. Even once this is over so that you could still stay home with your young ones. But once this is over you don’t need to stay inside all the time so don’t worry about that part.
If you have thought about being a Virtual Assistant then I would check out the VA Ninja courses that teach you how to be a Pinterest Virtual Assistant. The reason I would choose Pinterest VA is that there are so many businesses out there that rely on Pinterest for their income and that is where you would be there to help them.
The courses go step by step through everything you will need to know about being a Pinterest Virtual Assistant and even has a Facebook Community to help you through everything.
Start A Blog
This might seem like something far stretched for you right now because of the situation we are in. But it actually is a great time to start a blog. If you think about it there are sales everywhere and that includes things for blogging.
Right now my favorite hosting site for my blog is actually doing a special during these rough times. Siteground is offering 3 months of hosting for only $0.99. They know how tight of a budget the world is on right now and they still wanted people to be able to start their websites and blogs.
Now blogging is not a get rich quick scheme, which means it is a long term way of making money. There is always a learning curve when it comes to something new to you, but now is the time to start learning.
I know I don’t usually talk about blogging here, but I do believe in blogging a lot. I know you are reading this on my very own blog right now and that it might just seem like I am trying to get you to do something you think you would fail at. The thing is that I really just want to give you an option that you can succeed with.
If you are thinking that every topic has been talked about too much on the internet already and that you had nothing new to add then you would be wrong. There is always room for you on the internet and it is just up to you on how you want to use it. Or even if you choose to use it.
There are blogging quizzes out there if you are wondering if blogging might be right for you and what type of blog you should start. I suggest taking some of these quizzes to see if blogging would be a good fit for you.
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